“What is the world you operate in requiring you to step up to and what are the areas in which you struggle to respond?”

 Abuse in therapy is subtle and gradual and very hard to spot. Here are just some of the ways professional standards start to slip.

Gradual Boundary Crossing: Abuse often starts subtly, with the therapist pushing boundaries gradually, similar to the "boiling frog" fable.

Initial Trust and Gradual Abuse: Clients initially trust their therapist, making them vulnerable to gradually increasing inappropriate behaviour.

Majority Female Victims: Most clients who experience abuse by a therapist are women. But are they, or do just men not report it?

Gender Differences in Abusive Therapists: While most abusive therapists are men, a significant number are women, with differences in their methods of abuse.

Manipulation of Client's Desire for Approval: Therapists may inappropriately manipulate clients' natural desire to be liked and thought well of.

Sexual Abuse by Therapists: Abuse often starts with compliments on appearance and can escalate to boundaries being broken.

Non-Sexual Abuse by Therapists: Therapists may abuse their position by asking clients for personal favours or services, blurring the lines between professional and personal relationships.

Abuse as Medical Malpractice: Therapist or psychiatrist abuse, regardless of its form, is considered a form of medical malpractice.

Social Media Connection: Friending or following you on social media platforms.

Isolated Appointments: Setting appointments at times when no one else is around.

Vague Treatment Goals: Lack of clear treatment goals or not involving you in goal-setting.

Undermining Confidence: Making you doubt your abilities in work, parenting, or social interactions.

Unscheduled Check-Ins: Calling to check on you outside of planned teletherapy sessions.

Inappropriate Communication: Contacting you for non-professional reasons, including texting or emailing.

Special Treatment: Offering free sessions or unusually long sessions.

Meetings Outside Office: Proposing meetings outside the office for non-therapeutic reasons.

Undermining Support System: Making negative remarks about your friends or family, which can result in isolation.

Creating Dependency: Suggesting they are the only one who can help you.

Over-Identification: Presenting themselves as a uniquely perfect fit for you.

Blaming Client for Therapy Issues: Blaming you for lack of progress or not considering referral to other professionals.

Personal Disclosures: Sharing their personal issues to gain your sympathy.

Here are bullet points summarising just a few of the possible key points on how to identify abuse by a therapist

- No Sexual Behaviour: A therapist should never engage in or ask for or manipulate a client into any sexual behaviour, regardless of the client's feelings or actions.

- Inappropriate Sharing: Discussing details about other clients or sharing your information without authorisation is a sign of abuse.

- Comments on Appearance: Excessive, unexpected or sexual comments about your physical appearance are inappropriate.

- Meetings Outside Office: Asking to meet outside of the therapy office is a red flag, especially encouraging dual relationships.

- Inappropriate Communication: Contacting you outside of session or for non-professional reasons, including social media connections, is not acceptable.

- Personal Confidences: Sharing personal life details, especially about their sex life, is unprofessional. A therapist self disclose should be limited to demonstrating points which cannot be achieved any other way and in line with the clients goals.

- Shaming or Degrading Comments: Any communication that is shaming, humiliating, or degrading is abusive.

- Dependency Creation: Making you feel like they are the only one who can help you is a manipulation tactic.

- Pressure to Do Uncomfortable Things: Pressuring you into actions that make you uncomfortable and don't aid your independence is a warning sign.

- Encouragement of Harm: Suggesting self-harm or ignoring suicidal statements is extremely dangerous and abusive.

- Financial or Other Favours: Requesting financial assistance or favours outside of therapy payments is unethical.

- Trust Your Instincts: If something feels off in the therapeutic relationship, it's important to trust your gut.

- Blame and Threats: An abusive therapist may blame you for their actions or threaten to disclose sensitive information.

- Risk of Staying: Remaining in an abusive therapeutic relationship can be harmful and increases the risk of severe outcomes like suicide.

- Seek Help and Report Abuse: If you suspect abuse, it's crucial to seek help and report the therapist to prevent further harm to yourself and others.